Wednesday, October 1, 2008

My Resume


LisaQ posted her dating resume a few days ago, and I thought it would be fun make one for myself. I used the same format that she did, as all dating resumes should be uniform. I just plugged in my information! Um...we have a few things in common, Lisa!



Vitals
• Female
• 30-something
• 5’8”
• Curvy and sexy!
• Brownish-blondish hair
• Green eyes
• Caucasian (But an equal opportunity dater)
• Single, never married
• Beautiful smile
• Aquarius
• Social drinker
• Non-smoker
• Location-Durty South
• Lives alone with 2 cats (and no, I’m NOT the crazy cat lady!)

Qualifications
• Lady in the Streets, and Freak in the….well you got the point
• Honest and loyal
• Gainfully employed
• Homeowner
• Wonderful people skills
• Educated and intelligent
• Great sense of humor….I love to laugh!
• Low maintenance

Loves
• Blogging
• Writing
• Football (especially college)
• Movies & music
• Reading
• Sleeping in
• The sound of the ocean at night
• Jack Daniels (longest relationship with a man I’ve ever had!)
• Animals

Experience
I have been dating for almost 20 years now, so I have a lot of experience. I have been engaged twice during that time. During this time, I have learned what I want/need and what I do not want/need.

What I’m Looking For
I’m looking for a man who loves to laugh, even at himself sometimes! I hope to find someone who can be sweet, romantic, and fun all at once. I need a man who can also be a little dominant, as I don’t want to walk all over him. He should be goal oriented and/or established in life.

Physically, I prefer tall and thick men. I like a little something to wrap my arms around! I’m an equal opportunity dater and do not discriminate against race or religion. I prefer men within a ten year radius of my age, so I like them anywhere from mid-20’s to mid-40’s. I tend to prefer them in the 30’s though.

I am extremely sarcastic, and if you can’t hang, chances are I won’t like you too much! I have to be with someone who understands and “gets” me. If he and I can’t make one another laugh, I will get bored easily.

What I’m NOT Looking For
I’m not looking for someone who is emotionally unavailable, married, and/or enjoys playing the games of dating. I don’t care to be with a man who isn’t open and honest about his life and his feelings. I don’t need someone who is intimidated by a strong and intelligent woman. If he doesn’t like football, it won’t work. If he hasn’t read a book since he read Dr. Seuss with his mother, it won’t work. If he puts work before his friends and family, it won’t work. If he treats our relationship and/or emotions like he is conducting a business deal, it won’t work.

Physically, I don’t want a sloppy man. He should be clean and neat, this includes his home. Speaking of homes, he should NOT live with his Momma.

References
RG -Ex fiance
FWB-Ex something; current friend
The Engineer-ex-boyfriend; current friend
Angel and Demon- BFF; SaneAndSingle expert extraordinaire
MsFriendly- Best Friend; SaneAndSingle expert extraordinaire
Amy –Best Friend; SaneAndSingle expert extraordinaire

Interested parties may email SaneAndSingle at SaneAndSingle[at]gmail[dot]com

15 comments:

lisaq said...

Nicely done girl! They should be lining up at your door any minute now! :)

Oh and thanks for the shout out!

The Angel and Demon Within said...

I'll be glad to weed through the stack of applicants that you are sure to collect. You know I will kick the odd balls to the curb without a blink.

SaneAndSingle said...

LisaQ- Of course you got a shoutout! You are the inventor of the dating resume!

A&D- I know you know exactly what to look for!

princessdominique said...

That is too cute!

Ecrivian said...

I love it!

You've totally got to keep us posted if someone answers this...I actually saw something about it on Oprah once. A woman got really nit picky and wrote everything she was looking for and some guy read it and thought, "Is that all?" before responding.

And then he proposed to her.

I felt sick with jealousy just watching it.

Amy said...

I love the resume...it's fabulous! I'm honored you chose me as a dating humam resources assistant! Hee-Hee! I want to be the one who does the mandatory dead tooth, nasty hands and mansandal screenings!!!! LMAO

jo said...

oh i love this!! since you'll possibly get flooded by emails from potential suitors, i think you should insist that they email a pic of 'emselves. wouldn't want any surprises there... though then again that's never a guarantee anyway...

Greg Voltaire said...

Question:

When you talk about football, must the person agree with your team or just have the passion of it?

SaneAndSingle said...

Ladies...no one has answered my resume yet! LOL

Greg...the man doesn't have to share my favorite team with me. He just has to enjoy the sport or at least tolerate my love of it! :)

ubuntu said...

I would love to answer you ad. I will be emailing you soon with a detailed resume :)

SaneAndSingle said...

ubuntu- Are you really going to send me your resume or are you just playing with my emotions? ;) I'll be on the look out for it!

ubuntu said...

I am not playing with your emotions. It would require some thought into it as after all your list uhhum your resume requirement is long :)
After all you deserve a thought out response than the standard, I will rock your world kind

SaneAndSingle said...

Haha! Well please do get to work on your resume, ubuntu! I can't wait to read it! :)

shegavemethekeys said...

Hey saneandsingle,

I was wondering...when/why has it become so necessary for women to point out in their What I'm looking for section that the potential suitor NOT be married? You would have thought something like that was a given. LOL.

-Darryl

SaneAndSingle said...

Darryl,

You would think that UNMARRIED would be a given when making a dating profile/resume! Unfortunately, it has come to my attention that you must include that detail! LOL